Tuesday, March 29, 2011

W13, Day 1: Giant Cupcakes

Weighed in today at 211.0, putting me at -0.6 and down 18 pounds total with a million and a half to go.  Honestly, I was hoping and expecting a good deal more than a 0.6 pound loss today.  From Saturday up till yesterday, the weights were in the low 210's and I expected much the same today, though I did go over my food plan yesterday by about 4 points (I didn't resist a handful of jellybeans...Note, not that I 'couldn't' have skipped eating them, simply that I didn't resist---maybe I do deserve that smallness in my loss this week.)

Speaking of which, I didn't do a good job today.  I just didn't.  Maybe because I was upset with the scale this morning (Yes, I know this is an excuse).  Maybe because of unexpected temptation.  Maybe because of tiredness.  But I'm worried that I've put myself back for the week I'm just starting.  So, here's how I transgressed:

1)  One of my students brought me an unexpected gift of a "giant cupcake".  I'd been making jokes about giant cupcakes recently and today she randomly brought me a cake shaped and decorated like one.  It smelled heavenly (and indeed, it was incredibly delicious).  At lunch I took it into the staff room to share with others, but I did have a large slice...a very large slice.  Homemade chocolate cake with a chocolate shell at the base.  Wow.  So good...and so not good.

2.  After work I went for a walk with a friend who comes over a couple times a week to exercise.  Directly after that, I worked in the backyard for an hour with my husband.  By the time we gave it up for the day, I was not really hungry, but I felt shaky and empty...I did not feel like cooking, but I didn't want to sit in a restaurant either, or have fast food.  So we went to the grocery store.  Nothing sounded good.  I was exhausted and hungry, but I didn't know what to get for dinner.  I stood for awhile at the Chinese food counter, staring at the general chicken (17 points per cup) and I almost, almost went for it.  In the end, I settled for a roast beef sandwich on a roll with cheese (probably about 20 points).  I came home and devoured it.  Now I feel awful because my stomach hurts a lot (eating the whole sandwich was too much food all at once) and because I feel like I just did such a horrible job today.  What happened?! (Okay, I've already answered that....)  I guess I mean, what happened to my resolve?

I guess the consequence is, I feel sick, both mentally and physically.  Where's the Pepto Bismo?

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