Despite my best intentions to keep up with my blog, I have totally flaked out this week on posting. Things were going well last week until this week, when everything fell apart again. It began with a two day long training on Monday and Tuesday. Any time my routine is changed, things become more difficult. Toss in a supply of pastries and muffins and eating out at lunch and suddenly I'd consumed way too many calories. So I skipped weigh day. I did weigh in (at 197.4), but I didn't write an entry that day because it was a gain and I deserved it and I didn't want to face it. I didn't feel ready to face the failure.
I returned to work on Wednesday, but I didn't log my calories in the morning for the entire day as I usually do. I ate what I felt was a regular day until it came time in the evening for me to log everything. I was shocked to discover I was hundreds of calories over for the day. Yikes! On Thursday things were finally back on track. On Friday I was determined to keep things going, which I did until I got to work. Suddenly I found myself falling prey to the much dreaded Friday treats. I had two donuts and plenty of coffee cake. By that evening, since I'd already screwed up during the day, I added a piece of cake to that. Sometimes I wonder what the hell is wrong with me. I know these foods are bad for me. I know they are in the way of me reaching my goals. But I always feel that when the day has gotten away from me, I'm already lost and I might as well eat my way deeply into a hole. I know that doesn't make any sense, but it's where my mind is. I need a mind shovel to dig myself out of this place...hopefully it'll begin tomorrow.